| nothing changes on new years day. |
[Jan. 1st, 2007|07:48 am] |
"i wonder what will happen"
this phrase kept running through my mind on new years eve...the last day of 1999. i was at my house with most of my family members sitting on the livingroom floor. i was watching the tiny mirrors spin on "the ball" as it descended slowly to meet times square just like the years before. someone made a remark about dick clark and his infamous ability to elude age. i felt the comfort that i usually do being near my loved ones, but deep inside i felt uncertainty too. for a couple years now i had half feared and half anticipated the results of a worldwide rumor. Y2K would wreak havoc on the entire world when the clock struck twelve and the world would be changed.
5,4,3,2,1...i waited...and nothing happened. it was almost a dissapointment. even though i had alot of fun that night i went to bed with thinking "all this time wondering...for that? how boring"
not long into that year i thought to myself "2003..that's the year i graduate, it seems so far away."
5,4,3,2,1...i cant even remember what i was doing when 2003 came. probably with my family again, thinking about the next few months and how id get through my senior year. i found myself saying "wow that came quick" and then back to "i wonder what will happen".
when 2006 came i think it was the first year i really did nothing with my family for new years. i celebrated with one new friend and alot of her friends, in a place i was completely out of place in, some club in detroit. but i didnt mind it because i was excited about my future. this fairly new friend was sitting close by me and through all of the noise and music we watched dick clark. the age finally caught him that year, his speech was alot slower from the stroke he recently had. eventually people forgot about the tv again and danced more. but me not being much of a dancer nor a drinker, i decided to sit a few songs out. mash came on tv and i grinned and thought "i wonder what this year will be like"
the first few hours of 2007 have already gone by now. im spending this year at work reading my past lj entries. im not with my family, and the friend i had last year is nothing but past to me now. i find the results of things once exciting can sometimes still end up boring, but still im thinking "2007? where did the other years go?". this is the first year ive really looked back more than forward, and its scary.
its just a part of life, we race to the collect the next memory until we have a mess of past that we often forget and sometimes dont even enjoy as much as we really shouldve. hopefully ill learn this year to appreciate the memories as much as i appreciate the thrill of the future. not every moment will be worth the hype sure, but its time, and our time is limited, so enjoy it.
"i wonder what will happen" |
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| lord i was born a ramblin man |
[Aug. 31st, 2006|02:04 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  okay | ] |
| [ | music |
| | say anything | ] |
today my phone's hinge broke off, so the flip piece is just hanging off of the wire, but it still somehow is getting signal and holding on for dear life so i just taped it back on, and it still flips sorta too so...rock on with that. i plan on getting a new phone this weekend hopefully but until then im using this piece of crap until it finally decides to give up the ghost.
im starting to feel alittle better, still coughing but not as much, and my asthma isnt quite so bad as it was, so hopefully ill be a somewhat normally functioning person again soon.
this has nothing to do with anything, but i went to kmart yesterday and realized that i miss going schoolshopping. i dont miss the school part at all, but the thing i do miss is finding those packs of NFL pencils with different teams' logos on them. just the fact that my priorities back then were "which football teams are the best to represent on my pencil?" makes me miss being a kid. seriously those were things kickass, i need to find some. does anyone else miss those things??? |
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| viva la shitty phone |
[Aug. 27th, 2006|12:45 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | breakroom | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | blah | ] |
| [ | music |
| | "hip hop hooray" naughty by nature | ] |
soooo....i guess my phone isnt dead yet. or maybe it died and came then back to life a couple times. yesterday morning i was trying to revive it, well after i ran out of ideas again i got pissed and slammed it against the steering wheel in my car and threw it into my passenger seat. about a half hour later i happen to look over and notice its working fine again. then again when i dropped it off my dresser it went back to saying "no service", well i figured abusing once worked...so i spiked it like a football on the floor and sure enough it was working again. so i guess i just need to beat the crap out of it in order for it to work. weird. its like a cochroach, it cant be killed.
i think we might have a party tonight at the apartment. maybe another tin foil party, or maybe some other theme this time. i havent really decided its going down yet, but it probably will. so if you have no particular plans for tonight get ahold of me and we'll party at fenton estates. |
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| the end of an era |
[Aug. 25th, 2006|03:51 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | work | ] |
| [ | music |
| | misery signals | ] |
after about 5 years of getting the crap beat out of it on a daily basis...i believe the old nextel i90 has finally called it quits. too bad it didnt stay around for like one more week, because now i dont have a working phone at all. so if anyone needs to get ahold of me, i guess the internet is about your only choice for now, either that or a visit to fenton estates to talk to me in person.
the bonfire at tim eddy's last night was handled in the same fashion as always, epic and intense in every sense of the word. only this time it may have even more of a war zone than nomral. you mightve been able to see from the moon. we stacked 16 pallets on top of eachother and doused it with gas. we almost instantly had a 20 ft flame and the grass caught on fire and it literally had emily running for her life. of course the rest of us retarded guys were hardly phased by it and instead of fearing for our lives we yelled "SWEET!!!". then we listened to iron maiden and made bombs with 2 liter pop bottles and gas.
idiots. |
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| for sue |
[Aug. 17th, 2006|07:26 pm] |
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im hanging out with her tomorrow at THE TFOI AND BDB show in lansing and its going to be awesome...there ya go. |
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| this is how we roll... |
[Aug. 16th, 2006|03:57 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | work | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  good | ] |
| [ | music |
| | none really | ] |
so alot of cool things have happened in the last couple of days. yesterday tim eddy came by the apartment and we wrote a song together for the first time in who knows when, it was really fun to jam with him again. then after a while joe olsen and mike b came over too and we made a tbell run.
while we were sitting at tbell some techno club type of song came on and i started dancing at my seat while eating my burrito just because it seemed like fun. then some random girl caught me dancing so she started dancing too when she walked in, and all i did was shamelessy held my burrito in the air and said "yeah, you know where the party is!" haha. afterward she decided to sit at the same table as us and we talked for a while which was akward, she was kinda strange acting and way too nice for a stranger. then after she left us alone and went back to her friends another song came on the radio, fastball's "the way" i think it was, and suddenly both our table and their table just started singing along for some reason. it was an interesting tbell experience for sure.
then me and mike kicked some ass in twisted metal black. minion is a bitch.
around 1am or so i think, emily came over too and we all went swimming in the pool across the street again. sure it TECHNICALLY closes at 7pm but its open all night if you dont get caught right? after that we dryed off at a playground with a mammoth twirlyslide behind some fenton elementary school. oh and it had a cemetary RIGHT next to it, so we went thru a cemetary too. it was a good night full of spontanious stupid fun.
this weekend im seeing josh's band and gauge aka BDB play in lansing, then going up north to higgin's lake with my family. cant wait. |
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| at the end of the road you'll find what youve been longing for |
[Aug. 10th, 2006|04:07 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | fenton estates | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  depressed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | "fake plastic trees"-radiohead | ] |
i think im getting a cold or something, i cant stop coughing and its driving me crazy. you know when you cough so much that it feels like mike tyson is taking jabs at your ribcage and you cant do anything to block it?...yeah thats where i am right now. and it sucks. alot.
pulse opens tomorrow, its about time.
there are two things i want in my life more than anything right now, and ive been having no luck in finding either. this is really frustrating because i feel like my heart is in the right place about both and im sure id appreciate it if i were blessed with either, but then i see plenty of people who are taking advantage of what i pray for everyday and its clear to me that those people arent even grateful for the things theyre given. i just wonder to myself sometimes why God grants one person something they obviously dont even care much about, when someone else has been hoping for it for so long without any signs of hope. I dont know the future and im sure theres a reason for the waiting, but it just seems like God could spend his time better by sending his blessings to someone that would see value in it instead of the liars and the cheaters and the spoiled. its a concept ive struggled with for years, and honestly it feels like the light up ahead just keeps getting dimmer everyday. |
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| the end of all things will be televised |
[Aug. 4th, 2006|01:37 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | blah | ] |
| [ | music |
| | norma jean | ] |
on the way to work today i stopped at a gas station to something to drink and stuff and the old lady at the cash register said when i handed it to her "oohhh...thats a pretty card". does anyone else find that kind of odd? oh well, a compliment is a compliment right?
the storm the other night was AMAZING. i was on my way to work and called up travis and said "dude, you might wanna look outside, i think armegeddon is approaching fenton." seriously though, the sky was lit up constistantly pretty much all the way to work, and i had just gotten done watching war of the worlds (the new one) the night before. seeing that many lightning bolts after that movie just messes with your head.
so tonight will most likely be awesome. its the first of 3 days off for me, not one but two movies are coming out that ive looked forward to for a while now talledega nights and the descent. plus i get paid today. i like my odds. |
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| mmmeeeeeehhh...... |
[Jul. 28th, 2006|04:31 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | i LIVE at work | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | blah | ] |
| [ | music |
| | the new misery signals stuff, its tops | ] |
im at work and the janitor fags made me move out of the waiting room, so now im someplace different and it feels weird and there's no tv, but i DO get internet on this computer...so ill let it slide. now if i can just get the time to go faster. since i have alittle time to kill and a computer with internet, i suppose ill ramble for a sec.
more adventures at the fenton estates took place the other night. mike and tim eddy stopped by and we watched more retarded old horror movies that are a waste of our lives, but thats how we roll. lets just say you should never rent the movie frogs if you see it, first of all, there wasnt even a single frog in it, the jackasses used toads. second, most of the kills were done by other creatures like tarantulas and snakes and stuff. seriously a pitiful movie.
the real adventure was in between movies. you see, fenton estates is a great place, but there is no pool. lucky for us...there IS a pool at the apartment complex across the street. sooooo...we ignored the signs that said "no swimming after 7pm" and swam at mmmmm...1:30am maybe? bahahaha. im sure people saw us because every apartment is pointed right toward the pool, but nobody told us to get out so no harm no foul. the craziest thing is that i had put my ring (gift from my dad, VERY important) in my slippers in order to keep it from sliding off into the pool. well during our swimming we had to hide behind bushes for a sec because a truck showed up. well mike grabbed my slippers for me and the ring fell out into the pool. i said "no way im leaving that behind, i dont care who sees me in there." so i go back and luckily its on one of the stairs of the pool. we're planning on making our rounds to other apartment pools around fenton, so if anyone else has the balls feel free to join us some night.
oh and mike is the master of manualing on bacilia (our wheelchair), he balanced it for an entire movie and he only suffered two ass whoopings to the back of his head via the sofa the whole time. if you ask me, risking severe head trauma in order to prove your balancing skills is somehow not worth it, but i must say it was impressive. |
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| dont get me wrong, cutass jr is sweet, but... |
[Jul. 26th, 2006|01:56 am] |
today i visited my parents for alittle bit and my brother decided to come over for alittle bit, he said he had something he wanted me to see. so im thinking maybe something funny on the computer or something simple like that. nope.
that punk shows up in the driveway with a new white '03 convertable mustang. he sold his harley and picked up a sports car. so now this is what my family's car status is.
pops-'61 studebaker, 70something corvette, '04 chevy truck
mom-'05 cadilac cts
bro-'04 chevy truck, '03 mustang
me-'94 oldsmobile cutlass...thats it...just...a cutlass...with rust on it.
i feel awesome. |
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| tin foil party |
[Jul. 23rd, 2006|04:46 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | amused | ] |
| [ | music |
| | whoomp there it is | ] |
so the other day we had a party at the apartment.
we decorated
we even had a dj
we danced alittle
we smiled
craig tried to seduce me
it worked
we boogied in a circle for a while
then we boogied some more, not so much in a circle though.
tim tried to eat my face
i drank lots of orangette
walter made his own mug out of foil so he could join me.
then we continued to shake our bottoms until we couldnt anymore.
it was a fun night.
the end |
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| lj |
[Jul. 20th, 2006|10:29 pm] |
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so uuummmmm...should i do this anymore? let me know if you still read this and/or give a crap about it. im starting to debate whether its worth my time anymore. |
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| this may hurt you....its killing me. |
[Jul. 15th, 2006|04:35 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | work | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | sick to my stomach too | ] |
| [ | music |
| | bloc party | ] |
work, sleep, work, sleep, work, sleep. this lifestyle cant be a healthy one. not to mention other stuff going on in my life right now. sometimes i get so tired, and im not talking sleepy.
i wish i was still on the road. is it just me or does returning home from a good trip sometimes leave you feeling like youre returning to alot of curses you wish you could shake? i love home, but it reminds me way too much of things i wish i could forget sometimes.
a couple of nights back was about the only fun experience ive had since being back. making trouble in davison with some good friends is almost always a good way to forget your troubles, even if its just for a few hours, it helps. im expecting/hoping the when im not working i can once again do something that gets me doing dead sprints away from patrol people. the adrenaline you get from running from authority is great. "i wish it wasnt deisel!" haha
Oh, the clouds they brought a darkness and a hard rain's gonna fall,
And all my laughter ends in emptiness and a hard rain's gonna fall.
My every medicine causes more illness and a hard rain's gonna fall,
And until I let you go I didn't know, you were never mine...
You were never mine at all. |
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| my exit unobserved, and my homesickness absurd |
[Jul. 9th, 2006|11:17 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  angry | ] |
| [ | music |
| | august burns red | ] |
so if you dont know yet, and if you really care...im back from cornerstone. it was a great few days and i even though it was exhausting i really wish i didnt have to leave. ill post pictures later once i get batteries for my camera, but right now ill just tell you about my adventure on the way home.
i was on my way back, still in illinois and had a heap of stuff in my car from all the camping and such during cstone. well i changed a cd, rearranged some stuff around real quick and looked back up. in a matter of about 2 seconds max i had caught the attention of a sheriff, who had his lights on. i hardly had enough time to say "great, just great" and bring my car to a complete stop before the cop had already gotten out of the car, PISTOL IN HAND...and was screaming at me to put my hands on the steering wheel. he then opened my car door, yanked me out of my car by my shirt, told me to put my hands on my hood, and then frisked me. he asked me 3 times where my "stuff" was; to which i, as calmly as i could, said "there is nothing but clothes in there sir". he asked me if i had a weapon to which i denied too. he searched under my seats, in my laundry, sleeping bag, glove compartment, whole deal. that took about 20 minutes, until finally he let me talk. so after all this getting yelled at and everything, he gives me a ticket for 83 in a 70 which i swear i never did, it was just something for him to justify searching my car without a warrent. seriously, one of the most surreal, nightmare come true experiences ive ever had. thanks alot psycho cop bastard. |
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| prelude to one helluva time |
[Jul. 3rd, 2006|06:18 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | excited | ] |
| [ | music |
| | "the new black" everytime i die | ] |
so im leaving tonight to go to cornerstone 06!!! for those of you who dont know, thats a festival every christian band who's anybody plays at. think of it as a woodstock for christians, but even cooler. ill be there for like, 3 days? not really sure, this whole trip is pretty much going to be spontanious and whatever happens happens. after cstone i might go to either nashville or some new state ive never been to. ive got 6 days off of work to do whatever the hell i want, and that means its pretty much the first real vacation ive had in at least a good 2 maybe 3 years. so im making it count.
while im at cornerstone i will be staying with tim eddy and josh koch and his band. and we're all going to have fu manchu's for the whole trip, so im pretty certain that youre going to be seeing alot of pictures of fu manchu sporting studs including myself doing stupid crazy things, well cause thats just the way we roll. so...youve been warned. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 26th, 2006|07:26 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | okay | ] |
| [ | music |
| | bloc party | ] |
i dont feel like typing a bunch, but i want to update because alot of happenings have been well, happening. and ive got quite a few good pictures ive been meaning to post sooo...here ya go.
my roommates love me
me 'n bacilia
me + mike's sledgehammer = a lethal combination
pop yo colla mike!
fratboy starfish is a bad influence
thugs (adam is a sleepy thug)
time for work, maybe more later, who knows. |
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| oh and i almost forgot |
[Jun. 20th, 2006|02:16 pm] |
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i think im going to buy an ultimate warrior t-shirt off of ebay. |
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| GIT SNAKE BIT!!! |
[Jun. 20th, 2006|01:18 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | too much head banging=soreness | ] |
| [ | music |
| | "temptation come my way"-the showdown | ] |
haha i love that phrase. the showdown rocks and to all the little grand rapids kids that are still in highschool....if you cant handle a good rock band that knows their roots and plays stuff like old metallica and pantera for there soundchecks, well then you just need to call mom to come pick you up from this concert so she can take you home early, because nobody wants you there anyway.
and to chiodos, ive known the majority of you since you first started out in our little crappy highschool of davison. and yes you deserve credit, you worked hard for where youre at now and youve improved ALOT...but good lord, could you possibly attract any more 16 yr old girls? its getting to the point where its painful to watch you guys because of the constant giggling and screaming thats surrounding going on in the crowd. im not hating on you, im hating on your "fans" that arent fans for the right reasons, which includes alot of people. sorry, but it needed to be said.
haste the day's new singer isnt so bad, i actually kinda liked the new sound. and it dies today really impressed me too.
so after the concert, i somehow took the wrong e-way back home and decided to pretty much wing it and take a diagonal of sorts to I96. i knew i would find myself eventually in the right place, but i didnt know id be seeing a whole slew of amish signs on the roads along the way. no service on the phone, late night, and amish families lurking in the darkness for electricity users like me. scary stuff, texas chainsaw massacre type of scary.
so i finally get to something familiar, the city of ionia, when i find myself going 40 in a 25 with a cop right behind me. cue the sirens. and as my luck would have it not only was i speeding but recently my proof of insurance expired. but somehow, by the grace of God i guess, this cop was extremely nice after i told him my being lost situation, and he let me off with just a warning, and even told me the directions to find my way back home. so for mike and anyone else who knows what im talking about, sadly i couldnt tell the cop to "GIT SNAKE BIT!". |
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| yyeeeaaaahhh |
[Jun. 17th, 2006|12:30 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | work | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | amused | ] |
| [ | music |
| | the faint | ] |
tonight at work i got to speak with a young girl, probably in her late 20's, who had a couple of her fingers crushed in a factory machine. not like a few years ago, like a few minutes ago. i mean, blood, muscles, bone, the whole deal. just...right out there. thanks lady for reminding me why i NEVER want to work another factory job again. but no thanks for making me want to puke and cry right along with you.
oh, and theres a hispanic crazy man in the waiting room literally eating his shirt. i shit you not folks. ripping pieces of his shirt off with his teeth....and eating them. i guess hes a hungry dude. i dunno.
my job...its a unique one.
in other news, im tired, and i want to go back to my apartment and sleep. sunday (tommorow now) is father's day and then a concert in detroit. then i want to go to another concert in GR the next day. sooooo...ill probably not sleep for a few days. oh well, what can ya do? |
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